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Monday, November 3, 2008

Compromising Positions in the Gym - Plus a TRX Giveaway!

Those of you who know me in real life are quite familiar with how often and completely I publicly embarrass myself. As a child I used to think that ability, combined with my propensity to blush easily, was a curse but now I just embrace my "gift" and go with it. So for those of you who wonder if I really do all those crazy things in the gym that I write about, I offer you the photographic evidence:

The TRX workout, Day 1
(Note to self: shorts were a bad idea. As were shoes. And pride.)

Setting up the TRX proved a bit tricky. It's simple as pie to swing it over an immovable object - the chinup bar/cable machine right smack dab in the middle of the weight floor, in our case - and hook the carabiner through the strap. But getting the handles to be the same height required some serious gymnastics. Gym Buddy Allison bravely sacrifices herself for the pursuit of fitness (and sweat stains).
The first two exercises were basic squats and lunges while holding onto the handles. But number 3 was a doozy. Designed to work the hamstrings and hip adductors, you start like this:

Allison actually said "I'm ready for my exam now" as I took the picture. I almost dropped the camera.

And end like this (forcing the question, which is the lesser evil: facing the wall o' mirrors or the track?).


Next up were push-ups (and no, we didn't attempt the "atomic" variety today). Not only were these an excellent burn - you just move your feet farther back until it is as difficult as you need - but they also encouraged several bystanders to give the TRX a try.

Not that anyone cares but that little vein on each shoulder? I worked really really hard for those vascular badges of honor.

Allison managed to make look a little less like falling and a lot more like fun. Which it was, if I do say so myself.

The coup d'etat of the workout though was a move named the "supine pull-through." It should have been called Pure Ab Evil. Oh sure, it looked easy enough on the website. This is how you start out (sort-of):

Random Stranger: You're doing it wrong
Me: Unnhhhhh...?
RS: In the picture (points to my handy dandy laminated workout card) her butt is higher than her feet. You're sagging.
Me: Huuummmmmmhhhhh!
RS: It looks easy in the picture.
Me: Well it's not!! I can't lift my hips any higher or my legs fly apart!
RS: Oh yeah! Like that stirrups move you were doing earlier? That was a good one. You should definitely do that one again.
Me: Ewwwwww....

And this is... well, it's not at all how you are supposed to end but was as close as we could get. Yeah, Allison's butt's off the floor. And it's NOT easy, okay?? It's ridiculously hard. It's almost Wicked Wiper hard. That's right, punk.

By this time we had gathered quite a crowd and so we challenged our friend (not to be confused with Random Stranger, above) to give it his best shot. Yep, not even a super buff kick-boxer guy could do it. (Although he did get really close. And managed to make it look better than either Allison or I did.) Plus I just wanted to put up proof that Male Gym Buddies do exist!

The final humiliation of the morning involved an ab crunch that while easy enough to execute ended in this fun-for-everyone pose:

We concluded by using the TRX do some Pilates type moves and stretch out our sore legs. Excitingly, this ended up being closer to aerial dancing than I ever could have dreamed! Both Gym Buddy Allison and I "took flight" and sailed gracefully (cough, cough) in circles around the floor.

The Giveaway
The best part of the day was after we finished our work out/giggle-fest, packed up all our gear, and apologized to everyone we irritated; we passed an open studio on our way down the stairs. Want to know what was inside it, hanging calmly from a ceiling beam far far away from prying eyes? A brand spanking new TRX. That's right, after all the drama with stealing the chin-up bar and ticking off the regulars and basically taking over the weight floor, it turns out the Y already had one! It's like rain, on your wedding day. It's a free ride when you've already paid. It's the good advice that you just didn't take. It's 10,000 plastic sporks when all you need is a knife!!! Yes, it's ironic, dontcha think?

So you want a chance to join in all the fun? TRX has kindly offered a TRX to one motivated GFE reader (edited: the giveaway does not come with the door adapter or DVD). Not only is this thing super portable (it weighs just a few pounds) but you can literally use it anywhere and get a killer workout. PLUS you get to look as awesome as the Gym Buddies and I do. So here's how you win: please head over to the TRX website and check out their list of exercises. Then come back here and tell me which one you would most like to do and why. You have until Friday!

PS> The winner of the Danskin tee shirt is... Dr. J!! (Kidding. He was the first name I picked out of the cup though. But somehow I don't think pink floral is his thing.) Anyhow, the FEMALE winner is Randi! Drop me an e-mail, girl.

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